I haven’t written much in a while. I’m still here in Afghanistan. Still living in a 8×8 plywood room. Why haven’t I written? Because pretty much every day is the same. Every once in a while there are spurts of excitement but for the most part the winter isn’t the fighting season.
Last week I watched the movie Office Space and couldn’t help but see the similarities between the main character Peter Gibbons’ life and life on a FOB in Afghanistan. There was a scene in which Peter was in therapy because he hates his job. The conversation went something like this:
Peter: “So I was sitting in my cubicle today and I realized that ever since I started working, every day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me, that’s on the worst day of my life.”
Therapist: “What about today? Is today the worst day of your life?”
Peter: “Yeah.”
Therapist: “That’s messed up.”
That scene pretty much sums up my life right about now. Being here for this damn long is really messing with my head. I’m moody. I’m angry. I lose my patience quickly. I get frustrated over the littlest things. Why the hell can’t I get any sunflower seeds? (Damn you Pakistan!) Every day seems worse than the day before.
I wake up every morning pissed off. I’m angry at myself. I’m angry at the people around me. I’m angry at the Army. It is mostly misdirected anger and it usually subsides after morning sick call. But it is no way to start the day.
My only consolation is my amazingly upbeat wife who reassures me that This Too Shall Pass and that once I return to America my life will improve. She’s probably right. She has to be right. Right?
I still love what I do. I absolutely love being a dentist. I even enjoy being in the Army. I’m just tired of being at work 24/7 I guess. I miss my family. I’m ready to come home.